For some people, social interactions are one of the most challenging things in life. It can leave one feeling drained out. Some may even feel disliked or hated just because they don’t seem to fit in with a particular group of people. These all-consuming thoughts are not very uncommon, though. A lot of people struggle to believe that others like them.
But why?
There can be numerous reasons as to why people feel they are hated. They may suffer from low self-esteem, unsatisfying or abusive relationships, or mental health conditions like depression or anxiety. Some people are more prone to negative thoughts, and they tend to perpetuate irrational, negative beliefs about themselves. Such worries can override reason and rationality.
It is also typical for people to think and feel this way in a new social setting. It takes time to build reliable social support systems. However, till one feels well-adjusted in a new circle, there is a high possibility that they will feel isolated most of the time.
Some folks are downright over-analyzers. If their friends are unavailable, even for valid reasons, they will over-think to the point where they feel that their friends hate them. And often, this isn’t true. It may be possible that their friends are busy, so they cannot reach out promptly.
So What do You do if You Feel like Everyone Hates You?
When these feelings start to overflow, it is better to take a step back and re-evaluate. Here are some ways to cope with such overwhelming thoughts.
1. Recognize the problem
Hence, first and foremost, you must recognise the issue. Many people do not even realise that such thinking is super unhealthy and will only hamper their social connections. It would be best if you avoid being one of them!
It is also essential to find out what triggers such negative feelings. Which thoughts and interactions lead to the worsening of your mood?
Even when nothing external makes you feel hated, your brain might convince you that everyone dislikes you. Instead of dwelling on the issue and sulking over it, it’s better to be proactive and reform how you perceive yourself.
2. Stop comparing yourself to others
You must always challenge yourself to stop constantly comparing yourself to other people. It does no good and only hampers your self-esteem.
As you rebuild your self-esteem and sense of self-worth, remembering your accomplishments and accolades in life can prove to be a helpful strategy. It is always better to compete with yourself and grow the way you want, instead of comparing yourself with others.
Due to detrimental comparisons, you might feel that everyone else is far better than you, and you stand no chance of being their friend. This thinking will lead you down the path of feeling worse about yourself.
And it will get much easier for the negative thoughts to take over your brain again. More often than not, you will end up feeling inadequate and that everyone hates you because you are unworthy.
3. Change your perspective by looking at things differently.
Learn how you can re-frame the situation and your thoughts. Look at things from a different perspective and understand that there may be alternative explanations or more positive interpretations.
Don’t catastrophise, i.e., take every small action someone else does and turn it into a huge concern. Instead, better to shift your mindset and look at things more rationally.
Everything that others do or say is not a reflection of their feelings about you. Many people are too busy to notice the tiny details of you. Looking at situations objectively and understanding that feelings are not always facts can make you realise that other people’s behaviour is often not even about you.
4. Be kind to yourself and others
Wise individuals never downplay the magnitude of positive effects little acts of kindness can bring. Being kind to yourself will enable you to see yourself in a better light. It can also help you feel more secure about yourself.
When you are doubting yourself and are stuck inside the loop of irrational thoughts that everyone hates you, you should try to be as kind and generous to everyone as you can. And when you know you are kind to others, you will understand that people don’t have any reason to hate you. Spreading kindness can make you happier. Remembering this seemingly small thing can assist you in conquering your mind and snap out of the negative pattern.
5. Focus on the positive and surround yourself with positive people
One of the best things you can do when you feel everyone hates you is seek out loved ones you can trust. It can add a much-needed gush of positivity to your mind.
Surrounding yourself with positive and supportive people will make it easier to feel secure and happy. You feel admired, cherished, worthy, and loved!
However, some people are hell-bent on making you feel useless and worthless. Standing up for yourself and possibly letting go of such people from your life is your best bet.
6. Use positive self-talk to help you combat negativity and build confidence in yourself.
Knowing that you are unique, and uplifting yourself by using positive self-talk, can help you combat all the negativity that your mind throws at you. Make it a routine to cheer for yourself when you achieve something, no matter how small you think it is.
Don’t ever avoid giving yourself a pep talk when you feel low and need a boost. Treat yourself the way that you would treat a good friend.
These simple techniques can go a long way in restoring your faith and improving your relationship with yourself. Practice and patience will prove to be crucial tools required while you build confidence in yourself.
7. Do things that make you feel good about yourself (e.g., exercise, meditate)
Exercise enables you to push yourself for setting and achieving bigger goals than you ever imagine accomplishing. It helps in building a substantial amount of confidence. Exercising also releases the feel-good hormones, endorphins, that make you happier.
Many pieces of research now have consistent evidence that shows being physically active can improve your overall mood and outlook. You will be much less likely to believe that everyone hates you when you are in a good mood.
Meditating and spending time outdoors in nature can also help you rebound from a period of extreme stress and mental fatigue.
Meditating can help you recharge and rejuvenate and works wonders in calming your restless mind and helping you feel more at ease.
Final Words
But what if you keep feeling that everyone hates you despite your best efforts, and it is negatively impacting your day-to-day life?
Then, it is better to seek professional advice and consider additional treatment options. A counselling session with a trained healthcare professional may make you feel better.
United We Care provides highly qualified professionals. They are skilled in effective behaviour change therapy and help one get clarity about different feelings.
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